How to ask for personal support

How to ask for personal support

Barry Mason – Wyre Forest Youth for Christ

Some non-profits ask their staff and volunteers to raise finance towards their salary and associated costs through individuals. It is a method that recognises that donors give to people as well as projects. Donors are motivated by causes that are close to or important to them and people are included in this. It is also a way of sharing the responsibility of fundraising across the whole non-profit.

However, for the staff and volunteers, it can be a daunting prospect. For the extraverts with bundles of self-confidence and woo, it can come naturally. For the rest of us, it can be scary.

So I’ve sought some help from Barry, who has been raising personal support since 2001:

1. What's the best way to go about asking people to support you personally?

This all has to be about relationship. Not just between you and your potential supporter, but between them and the ministry you are involved in. Ultimately, these people will consider partnering because they know you personally, but the long term buy-in from their side will be so much stronger if they feel they can relate/understand/get behind the project as well. This doesn’t necessarily need stats and complicated graphs of impact (though they can help with people who are motivated by such things). What people really connect to is a story: Your story - of why you have committed your own time and employment to this cause; their story – the people who you will be serving, connecting with through your work; and His story – God’s vision for this work and what you believe can be achieved when people stand with you on this.

2. What have you learnt that doesn't work?

Avoiding the awkwardness and hoping that people will just work out that you want them to give.

I truly believe that we make things awkward when we avoid facing any potential awkwardness head-on. Be really clear about the concept that you would love for people to financially partner with your work. Don’t do subtle hints and prompts and wait to see if people respond to them. You are not the priority in other people’s lives, they are busy people with many commitments on their time, money energy and focus. Make it nice and clear that you would love people to support your work, then make it nice and easy for them to respond – if yes, that they can action it simply and promptly; if no, that they can comfortably say so and not feel they have disappointed or failed you. People are not stupid, so appreciate being spoken to with suitable respect with regards to an ask from them.

3. How do you overcome nerves/embarrassment in asking people?

Prayer is definitely key in this aspect. Asking God to be with us when we meet; asking Him to help me see the person, not just a giver; asking Him to bless them in their decision making; asking Him for favour. It really helps if you have been clear in advance – “Can we meet for a cuppa? I’d really like to catch up and speak to you about partnering with me in what God’s called me to?” So they know ‘an ask’ is coming, and may even prompt you to get on with it. Be sure to give quality time to the relationship before any ask comes up. Speaking about how life is for them and even what you might help with/pray for. Always being grateful for their time and friendship regardless of any response to a financial ask – knowing I truly value them, helps me to feel more relaxed about asking them for support.

4. How have you been encouraged through raising support?

I have been truly blown away by the amounts of, and ways in which, people have stood with me financially. I have had people on lower salaries than my own give support; I have had student friends give out of their grant; I have had people come in to millions and be so keen to bless others; I have had non-Christian friends stop all their other giving, but keep their partnership with me going over 15 years; I have had people say they are not able to support currently (believing this was just a way of saying ‘No’) – then contact me 4 years later and say they have had a change of circumstance and are now able to set donations up. I am constantly encouraged in the timing of gifts. When it has felt like I am completely alone in my calling, someone has stepped in and shown that they are with me – often without me having asked, at least not for some time.

5. Why is raising funds through individual giving an important source of income?

I believe the partnership aspect is absolutely key. Having several people all choosing to buy into what I am committing my life to gives encouragement through some of the darkest times of doubt. It also keeps you accountable. Having many people ask you how things are going, what’s happened since I last shared, wanting to know if their money continues to be a good investment of partnership.

It is also wise to spread the buy-in and dependency. Having had a widespread group of small regular supporters has meant that it has been easier to absorb when people have stopped their support. Over 18 years there have been all sorts of reasons that people have moved on from partnering with me – change of jobs, change in family life, family health, financial struggles – personally and nationally, reassessing their commitments. Thankfully, I have usually been able to cope with the reductions in support due to them only being a relatively small percentage of the overall figures. It would be a much harder blow to handle if I only had one or two sources of income and then one of those was to suddenly stop or reduce.

6. Any other comments?

One of my favourite comments from someone I’d been nudging and training over a long time to address their personal support struggles sums it up for me. When I asked her how it was now going, having strategically looked at who to ask, when to ask and how to ask, she replied.

“8 out of the 10 people I’ve asked have all said yes. It turns out, all I had to do was ask.”

That about says it really. There are lots of things to consider to help get it right, but ultimately, you just have to ask.

People may well say no and should feel totally at ease to be able to do so, but if you don’t ask, then you are saying ‘no’ on their behalf.

I truly believe people are blessed through their giving, so when you ask people to give, you are giving them a chance to be blessed through their response. Why would you want to deny someone that chance?

Thanks to Barry for his words of advice. Barry has served with Youth for Christ since first volunteering in 2001. He is now in the part-time role of Director of Wyre Forest Youth for Christ, where he is required to raise 100% of his salary and more to be able to do the ministry itself. Check out what he’s up to by following @bethel76.